Monday, July 2, 2018

Is Fred in the Refrigerator? A Book Review

For quite some time I've toyed with the idea of writing book reviews on Genuinely Speaking. I finally decided there's no better time than the present, especially when a college friend comes out with her second book.
If you've ever read a blog post of mine and enjoyed it, you will love Is Fred in the Refrigerator? Taming OCD and Reclaiming My Life by Shala Nicely. Shala genuinely speaks in her memoir, baring her soul in an effort to advocate for others who struggle with mental illness.

In this book Shala exposes her self - not just her feelings and emotions - but her true essence, and all the demons and rogues she battles throughout her life. While her story seems hopeless at times, a steady, confident undercurrent of triumphant hope prevails. Shala takes us on a personal journey of desperation from her childhood through adulthood when she finally receives a diagnosis only to continue battling a disorder that robs her life. It's a twisty-turny freak show ride of unfair circumstances from the very first chapter, and it'll keep you on the edge of your seat wondering what happens next. I read this book in two days, unable to put it down to find out how she truly did reclaim her life.

I met Shala at the University of Illinois when we joined the same sorority.
I remember Shala and her slight southern drawl, intrigued that someone outside the Land of Lincoln chose to become a Fighting Illini. The topmost image that comes to my mind when I think of her is overachieving success: accomplished student, actively involved with other clubs on campus, holding down a part time job, scoring a coveted internship at Disney, landing a great marketing job out of college, and always, always with a bright smile on her shy face.  

While everyone in our sorority surely admired her for her sunny disposition and unwavering commitment to academic excellence, a demonic voice tortured her, casting long, gloomy shadows on her beloved happy place. In the book she juxtaposes her experience on campus with my time at U of I as recounted in my post Ring Ching Ching where I talk about finding my home of the coolest, laid back group of friends to make a large university feel a little smaller. Shala's time there proved much different as her evil "salesman" tormented her constantly, hijacking her authentic college experience. 

I put my friend's book down and sobbed after reading the chapter "Sun and Shadows" and lay awake that night in disbelief at her reality. How did I not know? While Shala and I weren't best friends in college, she was definitely more than just an acquaintance to me. How did I miss the fact that she struggled so hard? 

It was because Shala mastered the art of deception. Even her senior year roommate and fellow sorority sister didn't know the torture she endured on a daily basis, because as a young child Shala perfectly followed the rule her monster created in her mind: that she could never tell anyone about her darkest thoughts, or all the horrifying images her creative oppressor placed in her mind would come true, her family and friends would be destroyed, and it would be all her fault. 

So instead she overachieved with a constant drive for perfection and became a wildly successful adult. 

Or did she?

Read this book to find out. Chances are you or someone you know struggles with mental health. Obsessive Compulsive Disorder stars as the villain in this book, along with its cousin Body Dismorphic Disorder and a sprinkling of Depression. The stories in the book and the medical information so intricately woven throughout provide hope not just for the author, but for everyone. 

It's universal in its ultimate message, because we all struggle mentally at some point in time. I kept google open and learned something new with every chapter, not to mention a few authors I intend to check out for my own self-improvement. A consummate professional, Shala quickly answered my own questions regarding mental health. As I shared before, Kahley struggles with Generalized Anxiety Disorder, and Shala's insight proved most helpful for some questions I had regarding her ongoing treatment. 

Without giving everything away, I'll tell you this: I am going to reunite with this girl. We are going to hug it out so hard, have ourselves a good cry, and then I'm going to take her by the hand to the nearest couch with a TV in front of it. We're going to eat buttered popcorn while we watch throwback "Must See TV" and movies from the early '90s as we discuss life, dreams, goals, and how to be our best selves.

It's a reunion I am so looking forward to.

XOXO,
Jen


Is Fred in the Refrigerator? Taming OCD and Reclaiming My Life by Shala Nicely is available for sale on Amazon in print or in downloadable format here.